How Are We Really Dealing with the Stress of this Season?
It was Friday eve, cue the music, confetti and cheering, I was heading into a week off of work. Its summa’ time baby and momma’s off of work for a whole week! Woohoo!
Fast forward to Monday morning, I am sitting with God feeling exhilarated, rested, joyful…
Umm Nope. I am irritated, mad and crabby.
Yes, that’s what I said, I was and still am a little angry with God. As I sat with my pen and paper, I started to brain dump a little.
Raining, bills, no vacation, kids at home, school survey, no back to school?, half back to school?, more online learning?, etc.
After some time of dumping my frustrations on paper, I realized I was frustrated with all of it. Yes, I was still frustrated with COV19. I thought we were done and moving on, but no it’s still continuing. Call me naive, but I was looking forward to moving past this season.
I mean come on God, are you serious?
Global pandemic - check
Racial injustice - check (this is not new, but I am learning so much more about the injustice in our world)
Sickness - check
Hate - check
Anger - check
Hostility - check
And not to mention, are my kids going back to school????????????????????? Ahhh!!!!!!!!!!!
But then I read this quote.
I think my vacation time allowed me to slow enough to actually stop fixing everything for everyone and managing all the things. I had been dealing with the stressors of life change in a global pandemic. Once I slowed down, I felt all the feelings of the last couple months and deal with the actual stress of it all. Truthfully, I wondered where God was (and is) in all of this and what the heck He was doing? My day continued on irritated and frustrated.
A couple days later, I had to take one of my children to the doctor for a yearly physical. There were shots involved and fear set in pretty strongly. On the way there, we were talking about fear and ways to practically deal with it. You know the basics - deep breaths, prayer, “you got this!”.
But then I found myself saying, “You know even in the hard stuff I have lived through in my life, I have always known that God was there and He never left me. I might not have understood it at the time, but I always knew He was there. And most of the time after it was over, I could look back and see there was some good that came from it and definitely some lessons I learned along the way.”
Well, dang- there God was showing up again as we headed down the highway. He was showing me what my heart needed to hear in this season-
He’s still here, He never left us and He is good.
So, even in my frustration and real grief of the hard season this has been and is, I know my Father has us all in His Hands.
Love, B
