5 Simple Ways to Beat Exhaustion
For years, I have wanted to start a garden. Also for years, other things have stepped in more important and my little dream for a small garden had not taken off.
UNTIL this year, baby!
I went to Lowe’s and bought two tomato plants, two pots, and some organic garden fertilizer. I mean life is busy, so this was the best I had to offer. We all got to start somewhere- right?! I placed those babies in the pots and watered them faithfully.
I even posted my burgeoning plant on social media. My mom commented and told me I needed to get a cage to put around the plant. I wanted to get one, but I put it off. Then my parents came over and casually suggested it again. And again, I said I would. By now, I had three blossoming tomatoes coming out. I was so pumped. But I didn’t go get the cage.
On Mother’s Day, as I was reading a book in our back yard and I heard “snap”. The whipping winds in my backyard had snapped my precious tomato plant in half.
You know why? Because it had no support. You are supposed to put a cage or stake around the tomato plant as it grows. Not only does the cage support the heavy limbs, it helps it grow stronger and more fruitful.
And the Lord said to me, this is not a coincidence that this happened on Mother’s day. My heart needed the reminder that we need support to grow, strengthen and flourish.
We, like the tomato plant, grow and more things get added into our lives. New school activities, new work ideas, changing of schedules, new puppies in your home (bless it), and much, much, more. This can lead to exhaustion. The wind had been blowing my tomato plant all day long. Finally, when it couldn’t take the pressure any more it snapped. Ever been there? Yeah, me too. Honestly, I have been there a lot as of late.
Also like the tomato plant, we can’t support all that extra weight on our own. Support in our lives helps us carry the load, but it also helps us grow stronger and be more productive.
Here are 5 supportive ways to beat exhaustion (and prevent snapping)
Good conversations with friends. You know, the good conversations that involve laughter and insight. A good laugh with a girlfriend is worth its weight in gold.
Let other people in to help out. I admit it, I can get in martyr mode. It sounds like this, “No I got it, I don’t mind, I can do it”… Otherwise known as resentment & bitterness.
Pour it out with God. I know journaling is so therapeutic for me. It is a safe place for me to get my feelings out and process my thoughts. Maybe, you need to just shut the bathroom door and cry it out (I do that one too). Usually the Lord reveals things to me through the pouring out. He wants us to come to Him with all our concerns.
Put the freaking phone down. Comparison is a sneaky sucker. The amount of information coming in is not good for our brains. Comparison and information overload lead to exhaustion. I was admittedly scrolling more. I know when I am escaping to my phone, its time to put it down more.
Playing worship music & diffusing essential oils. We tend to forget we have other senses that bring us pleasure. I love good, clean smells. With my essential oils, I can diffuse oils to help combat my mood. I also love worship music because it changes my mindset. Good songs remind me of who I am in Christ and what God says about me.
I hope you can add one of these supportive ways to your day. We all need help lighting our load.
Love, B
Always Hard on Yourself ? 3 Tips to Stop Self-Criticism
Today, I would like to confess my first born, perfectionistic tendencies. I am pretty hard on myself and I bet I am not alone. Recently, when work demands increased, school schedules changed (again), business plans needed to be developed and oh, yeah we got a puppy, I found myself an irritable mess. I was snapping at my family and feeling pretty critical.
You ever feel like you are just a drill sergeant at home and not really fun to be around? Please see me raising my hand.
Turns out the more tired we get, the more critical we become. It goes like this- we are critical of ourselves first, then we are taking it out on everybody else.
I decided to put myself in a timeout and spend some time in God’s word. In His Gracious Love, He led me to these scriptures.
1 John 3: 18-24 MSG
18-20 My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love. This is the only way we’ll know we’re living truly, living in God’s reality. It’s also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.
21-24 And friends, once that’s taken care of and we’re no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we’re bold and free before God! We’re able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we’re doing what he said, doing what pleases him. Again, this is God’s command: to believe in his personally named Son, Jesus Christ. He told us to love each other, in line with the original command. As we keep his commands, we live deeply and surely in him, and he lives in us. And this is how we experience his deep and abiding presence in us: by the Spirit he gave us.
After reading these verses, I realized my debilitating self criticism was not from God. I so needed that jolt out of the shame pit I was living in. Upon further reading, I realized practicing REAL love was the ONLY way to shut down this self-criticism. Real love not just to the puppy and my people but to myself. Berating myself for every snappy, condescending comment was not helping. Sitting in shame for my outbursts about the dishes in the sink (for the 3,456 time) was not helping either.
We have to allow God’s grace to wash over us. We also need to stop trying to do everything so perfectly. Perfection is not realistic - there will be dishes in the sink, especially when your dishwasher has been broken for two months and the part is “backordered” for an eternity.
These verses go on to say “once that’s taken care of and we’re no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we’re bold and free before God!”. Its almost like if we are living in self criticism, we are not truly free and bold before God. We are unable to stretch out our hands and receive God’s gifts. We allow the shame and self criticism to hold us back from His goodness.
Can self criticism block blessings in our lives? Maybe the blessings are there but our critical mindsets are causing them to be missed. Yikes, this is true for me.
All that shame we are feeling for where we went wrong - its not from God. All that beating yourself up for yelling - its not from God. Frankly, these are from satan to keep us stuck in the bitter cycle of shame and self destruction.
I know you want to live free and bold before God, so what does practicing real love to ourselves look like.
Real Love is saying I am sorry, then letting it go. We make mistakes, they make mistakes, we are humans with imperfect words and actions. Say you are sorry and move on.
Real Love is being honest with what you need. Saying I’ll do it all the time serves no one. It increases bitterness and resentment in you, which will eventually come out as anger and rage. So let’s ask the kids to wash the dishes. We can tell our co-workers we need help with that new project. We can ask someone to help with the kiddos. We show respect and honor to others when we are honest with them.
Real Love is setting healthy boundaries. Guys, do you know Jesus walked away from people that were sick? He did not heal everyone when He was human. He could not do it all even when He was part God. Why in the world do we (with no part God) think we can too? Setting healthy boundaries helps us give our best selves to God’s purposes He has on our lives. He does not call us to everyone and everything. Spend some time prayerfully asking God what priorities He has for you in this season. Then ask Him for courage to let the rest go.
Listen ladies, you are not alone. We do have a very big God that loves us too much to let us sit in this self-criticism. As the verse says, “We’re able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we’re doing what he said, doing what pleases him. Again, this is God’s command: to believe in his personally named Son, Jesus Christ. He told us to love each other, in line with the original command. As we keep his commands, we live deeply and surely in him, and he lives in us. And this is how we experience his deep and abiding presence in us: by the Spirit he gave us.” (emphasis mine)
We can live deeply and surely in Him. I want that! I need him living in me so I can love others as He does. I pray for each person readign this today that we let go of shame and practice real love. May Gods peace and love fill you up today and everyday.
Love, B
5 Things Gained from My Social Media Break
I knew deep in my soul that I was feeling burnt out from everything. Mid-January while watching the Inauguration, I bowed my head and listened to one of the pastors pray a beautiful prayer. As his words of surrender and hope to God and our nation washed over me, I began to cry. Tears streaming down my face, I realized how weary I felt from all of it. The racial tensions, presidential debates, hostile commenting and general anger everywhere. I had thought none of “that” stuff was getting to me, but in the boldness of beautiful prayer my soul gave way to the pain I had been feeling for months. I realized right then and there that my soul needed a break from social media.
Have you been there? Weary, emotionally exhausted?
I decided to delete my social media icons off my phone and quiet my influx of excessive information. The results of my social media fast were amazing. At first it was like a nervous tick with my hands wondering what to do when I had a moment to myself or was waiting. Soon enough, I settled into the rhythm of looking around and up instead of down. I took some walks and dug into books and podcasts.
Below are the top 5 things I gained from my social media break.
1 - Better Sleep I guess the stress of all that information was causing me more anxiety than I realized.
2 - More Perceptive I noticed beauty in nature. I noticed pain in my child's eyes when they were saying they were “fine”. I was missing these being distracted on my phone.
3 - More Creativity My creativity in writing felt lost and burnt out. It wasn't just in writing though, I was not feeling creative in life. The zest for fun and adventure was squelched by the need to get everything done. Getting creative allowed me to step out of my spin cycle of production.
4- More Laughter I am embarrassed to admit this, but I am a doer, a get things done girl. News Flash- no one wants to be around a drill sergeant all the time. That drill sergeant was killing my joy. I was hardest on myself (always). The social media world was telling me to be more, do more, and you are not enough. You don't realize it but it takes a toll on your emotional health. Stepping away allowed me to lighten up a bit and laugh more.
5- Stronger Relationships As you could imagine, more laughter, lightening up and noticing more in others really helped my relationships. Turns out noticing others and laughter really can help in parenting and friendships. Also, funny story, not scrolling on your phone helps you focus more on what God is trying to speak to you. Who would have thunk it?!
So going forward, I will be more intentional with my social media time. My soul and relationships need me to be intentional on those platforms. If you are feeling these warning signs, it might be time for a break.
If you do, send me a message and let me know how it goes!
Love, B
5 Warning Signs You Need a Social Media Break
Have you ever felt like you were half way doing everything? You were in the kitchen, but your mind was answering the work email. Or maybe your kid walked in the room, but you were looking down at your phone and missed the tears in their eyes. Well, friends this was me as of late. I was feeling so tired and scattered. I knew I needed a little break from socail media. I hadbeen preaching to my children about social media distraction and comparison, but turns out I needed to be preaching to myself. Geez, I hate when God does that.
If you feel this, you are not alone. Here are 5 warning signs that it’s time to take a break from social media.
1- You feel weary in your mind and body. Our minds were not created to take in so much information. The continual feed of information creates weariness. We don’t realize the amount of mental and physical energy it takes to take in so much information and process it emotionally. Laying in bed worried about someone’s home in California, that you have never even met is causing you unnecessary stress and exhaustion.
2- You feel irritated at everyone and everything. In your feed, a friend gets a new puppy. Instead of being happy for them, you comment how they are always getting something new. Or it’s seeing another friends recent success at work and feeling resentment.
3- You have compassion fatigue. I do believe there is too much pain in the world today. But there always has been. I don’t mean to make light of the pain it’s just that I’m not sure how much we can withstand. There is compassion fatigue. As Christians we are called to lead a life of love which means we have compassion for others. When I am weary from too much pain, my compassion for others goes very low.
4- You are spending more time with the people on the screen than the people in your real life. Whew-this one hits hard. Go check that screen time app on your phone.. I’ll be right here. Craziness right?! Once I took a break I started noticing things in my kids I had been missing. They were actually coming in the room to talk with me. Had I been missing it staring down on my phone? I was picking up on non-verbal cues in my conversations that I had been missing.
5- The phone is with you all the time. Watching a movie, scrolling. Watching a show, scrolling. Going potty, scrolling. Waiting in line, scrolling. Where is the space for God in all that? Furthermore, that’s frankly exhausting. Our minds need white space to process and to rest. If your phone is with you all the time, it’s really hard to stay off of it.
Even if it’s just for a day or a weekend, a break will be just what your heart and mind needed.
Love, B
10 Lessons 2020 Taught Us
Oh 2020! You were a doozy. I know I am not alone in this. It was a year of tremendous loss, fear, anxieties, depression, tension, hate, anger, frustrations, CHANGE, uncertainty and pain.
But I believe pain is a teacher. 2020 did teach us a couple things.
I did learn a couple things in 2020 that I think will stick moving forward. Maybe these will ring true to you!
Our children are more resilient than we give them credit for. There were struggles. Homeschool isn't always the most fun, but we did it. If there is one lesson our children need is that “we can do hard things!” These kids had schedule changes repeatedly, had to wear masks to restaurants and in school and stared at screens for hours and hours on end. This generation of children may very well change the world.
Our world has been worshipping the wrong things for way too long. Listen we did not really need a global pandemic to show us this, but it certainly amplified things. Healthcare workers, front line workers, teachers - you are the heroes of this whole pandemic. You fought for us. In your exhaustion, you pushed through so we could live and have a future. We should remain forever grateful!
Health and wellness matter. We should be taking better care of our bodies. We are not machines and have limits. We need rest and strong bodies to fight off illness. May we make our health and wellness more of a priority moving forward.
Positive healthy mental health takes work. We can no longer sit around and wait for circumstances, authorities, media or others to boost our attitude. It is up to us. Joy is a choice we must fight for through worship and gratitude.
We are a world in heavy need of more compassion. Our hearts are weary, but maybe God needs to get us there to soften to our brothers and sisters both alike and different. While we think we have an answer for everything, each soul has a story we know nothing about. May we be less careless with our words, actions and posts moving forward.
It starts with us. Sometimes in the busyness of life, it is easy to blame others. We don’t listen to the stories, we move on. But when life slows down, we have to listen to other’s stories. We tend to lean in more and crave connection. May we slow down more and listen more.
We need more humor! Life is hard. A funny meme or video would be enough to get this family out of its funk during hard days. So let’s choose laughter.
Proverbs 17:22 MSG “A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired.”Gratitude is a muscle that needs to be trained. Slowing down helped me realize all that I had to be grateful for. Gratitude is not my go-to emotion; actually I way more sarcastic (read negative) at times. I learned to practice gratitude through writing, walking, words, and/or songs. Either way we need to practice gratitude.
Our peace is ours to preserve. Turns out we can not gain peace from the world. Honestly, I do try between the latest fashion, hair gadget to amazon prime, but our peace is ours to preserve.
No matter what changes occur, He is still good. I had to get real quiet to be able to really believe this one, just being honest. With so much loss, pain and negativity, I spent a lot of time asking God, “what the heck?” and “where are You?. In the quiet of His Word and His Grace, I was reminded that we are not promised pain-free living, but we are promised His Presence. His Presence beside me, before me and beyond me. He restores my soul like nothing else can.
Listen friends, 2020 was not the first year that we have all seen pain. We are warriors having walked through pain in all our pasts. One thing that is universal is pain and change. Let’s stand strong into 2021 with faith, trust and laughter!
Love, B
When Momma Feels Angry
Lately, there has been this atmosphere of anger, irritability and frustration. To be honest, I have felt it. Frankly, I have gotten sucked into it. One night last week, I just had to put myself to bed. I knew if I stayed up any longer, I was going to say something I regretted. One child asked me a simple request from the grocery store and I about lost my mind.
I found myself walking back to my bedroom wondering where did that outburst come from. I shared this with some close friends and I was not alone. I started paying attention to what was around me. Angry social media feeds, angry commercials on TV, tired bodies within my home, work meetings full of exhaustion and irritability… and it occurred to me that we are in a pandemic of hostility.
I realized I was marinating in hostility without me even realizing it. Later that week in church during worship my eyes filled with tears from weariness and surrender, asking God for help. I felt so angry and tired.
Have you been there? Are you there now?
We need some peace.
Since we can only control ourselves, we are the ones that have to make some changes, not everyone else.
Here are some things I did remove the hostility around me:
I decided to take a break from social media. I had tried to mute accounts and unfollow accounts that made me feel frustrated, but it wasn't enough. So I shut it down.
I also got more rest. I went to bed earlier. Turns out older kids like to stay up later. So I had to make myself leave the room before the movie was over and go to bed.
I also took some breaks during my day to do some things that filled my soul. For me, that was walking, stretching my body, sitting in the sun outside away from my computer, reading a book for 15 minutes, sitting down to eat a meal away from my computer, and on some days that meant laying horizontal for 10 minutes before starting the afternoon Uber service for my kiddos.
They were simple strategies that slowly made a difference. I think they can make a difference in your life too. We may not be able to change the climate of hostility around us, but we can make some changes in our lives.
That is why I made this free list of ways to daily take care of your soul. Taking time daily to proactively take care of your soul allows for a more peaceful heart and home.
Love, B
16 Now may the Lord of peace himself give you his peace at all times and in every situation. The Lord be with you all 2 Thessalonians 3:16
How to Bring Peace to Your Home This Winter
Heading into the winter like.. WAIT WHAT? (Do your kids say “Wait” all the time as a filler word? Mine do.)
Global Pandemic- Wait, are the numbers rising?
Shorter Days- Wait, is it already dark outside?
Tension - Wait, Facebook arguments & public protests?
Oh, lest we forget that the Holidays are upon us. Now, let’s add in some glorified hustling to the mix.
I realized last week that we were moving into a new season. We will have to be intentional in cultivating our wellbeing and soul as we head into the coming months. That means we need to be proactive versus reactive with everything coming our way.
We need to practice releasing some mindsets to maintain our peace this season.
Release Expectations
We need to release the expectations we have on ourselves to have the perfect Holiday season. Recently, I found myself in Kirkland’s (home decor store) wanting to redecorate my whole home for the Holidays. It just smells so nice in the store. Something about it makes me want to have that atmosphere of peace in my home. But I don't need to buy all the shiny things to achieve that. I can simply cook some delicious pumpkin bread with my daughter and cultivate the feeling of home without all the excess purchases. The memories made last longer than the new decorations.
Release the Need to Go to all.the.things
Let’s release the idea that we need to go to every gathering and every activity. Whether it be family or friends, there are so many well intended people in our lives that want to host and include us. That is wonderful, but it can also be exhausting. It also can be stressful when you are worried about sickness. So as a family decide what is most important to you and release the rest. You can not go to everything and love your people well. Ask me how I know…
Release the Need to Please
We need to release the need to please everyone. It will never happen. (Preaching to myself over here) I don't even mean pleasing all your friends, I mean pleasing everyone within your home. Each person in your home is an individual with unique gifts, desires and personalities. As a family, we are a team which means sometimes you take one for the team. Teaching our children to compromise and roll with disappointment well is a requirement for real life.
In Matthew 5, Jesus shares with us the Beatitudes in His Sermon on the Mount. Jesus wanted his people to know how to live, so He taught them these Beatitudes. I have heard these referred to as the Be-Attitudes, which means the attitudes we can cultivate through the Holy Spirit living in us.
One important Be-Attitude is in Matthew 5:9, Jesus states, “God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.”
Notice that it says, work for peace.
Ladies, we will have to work for peace in our hearts, minds and homes. To start to cultivate peace this season, we need to release the expectation of a perfect Holiday season, release the idea that we need to go to everything, and release the need to please everyone.
Release it friends!
I also have a list of simple ideas to daily restore your soul here so you can thrive this winter season.
Love, B
How to Simplify Healthy Eating
Healthy eating sometimes gets pushed aside because it can feel so overwhelming and complicated, but healthy eating makes a difference in how we feel. When I am feeling anxiety and depression creep back into my life, I always check my eating, drinking and activity habits to see if they are helping or hurting my mental health. It's important to simplify healthy eating so it feels like something we can actually achieve.
Add greens to most meals - salads, spinach, avocado, green beans, etc. Greens have vital nutrients unlike other foods.
Make veggies your main course. You can have the meat, but make sure your veggies are more. Vegetables contain protein too. Our bodies need the vitamins provided from veggies.
Sip on water in between meals. Our body is 80% water so water helps all our bodily functions work properly and at their best. Plus, this helps regulate your hunger.
Make a Weekly Meal Plan. Less decisions mean more mental energy. Pre decide to eat good meals instead of on the fly when you are starving and on the road. It happens, it just can’t be your MO all the time. Check this freebie out to help you simplify meal planning.
Allow for some treats. Life is too short to not have the cake.
5 Ways to Simplify Exercise
Exercise is something that has been vital to my physical health as well as my mental health. When I decided to stop taking anti-depressants years ago, I knew exercise would be a vital part of my recovery from depression.
In this season of uncertainty and confusion, it is good to focus on things we can control. We can control what we do with our bodies and what we put into our bodies. Exercise is beneficial to our whole body as well as our families. But it doesn’t have to be complicated.
Let’s simplify exercise- shall we?!
Commit to 15 minutes a day
Yep that’s all you need to start. Thinking we need to complete hour long workouts is limiting. Sometimes finding an extra hour for exercise can seem really daunting. But I bet you do have 15 minutes. You may think you are packed to the gills with activiity, but check that screeen time on your phone. See there you do have 15 minutes. :)
Link exercise with family or friend time.
Link it with people you love. Family bike rides, walks with your teenager, walk with a friend are all examples of easy ways to slide in movement. Linking up with others helps your mental health too. A good walk with a good talk can change your whole day.
Make it self care time
I consider a walk around the neighborhood with a podcast or Pink blaring in my ears- self care. We must fill up to be poured out. Alone itme can be hard to come by these days. So a little jaunt around the neighborhood can be just enough for your body and mind.
Start Small
Please…you don’t need a gym membership or a new app to move your body. We compare our starting point to someone else’s finish line. Scrolling through social media can make you believe that if its not perfect, its not worth attempting. But that is not true. Starting small defeats this ugly thought.
Do what works for your body
I do wish I was a runner but about 10 years ago I decided nope. Every time I attempted it my hips hurt for days afterwards. It’s not worth it to me. So walking yes, running nope. Do what works for you and your body. Exercise might not feel great at the moment but it needs to be good for your body. Not everything works for everybody. And that is A okay.
5 Things Saving My Life Right Now
Recently, it has become quite a heavy load for the parents (especially moms) of the world. We have added so many new responsibilities in the last 6 months. Frankly, in the last month things have really cranked up. (Side note: my family makes fun of me for using the term “cranked up” because I am usually referring to a car. I am from the South, bless my heart)
Now in this eternal quarantine, we have the back to school part portion added in. This portion of the quarantine has thrown us for a loop. For most of the world, we are homeschooling to some extent. And with that comes so many challenges and new responsibilities. From your child’s IT manager to cafeteria employee to recess enforcer, oh and by the way, make sure you maintain that job and home you are grateful to have. Also, after school activities have started back. In one sense, we went from everyone at home to now everyone going in many different directions.
The other day I was venting in my journal. “God, it's the school work, my job, this house, the bills, the groceries, the crazy unrest in our world, injustices, inequalities, anger, government, sickness, unknowns, uncertainties,...hard, hard things. I felt the Lord tug on my heart. I think you might need to hear this too. He said to me,
“Are you holding yourself to a higher standard than I have asked of you?
I am perfection, not you”.
I went on to write this download from the Lord in my journal.
“Please validate the way you are feeling. Stop trying to push it away, cover it with pep talks and task lists. This season is hard. You do have more responsibilities than ever before. Validate that you are weary. Validate that this season is weird and new. And validate that you feel like a fish out of water at times.
I am the Way and the Truth. But, I am not a harsh taskmaster slapping a demerit on some scorecard every time you mess up or lose it. I created you and knit you together in your mother’s womb. I know your weaknesses and your gifts, in fact I placed them there. Each delicate piece, I put together uniquely. I have never asked you for perfection, this is from the world.
I am grace, love, mercy, tenderness, kindness, forgiveness, peace and hope. I am the Sovereign God, but I am also deeply personal to you.”
God quickly reminded me that I was holding myself to a standard that He never asked me too. And frankly, I was holding everyone around me to that same standard. It was a gentle, but powerful reminder.
So as I let that truth wash over me, I also needed to implement some practical solutions to my everyday life.
5 Things Saving My Life Right Now
Do One Thing at a Time
Honestly, this is my worst enemy. Working from home for years has made me some type of multitasking, over ambitious crazy person. The day goes something like this -work at your desk, go to the bathroom, scrub the toilet, start a load of laundry, answer an email, hop on a zoom call, help write an English paper for one child, rehearse geometry with another child and oh yeah the laundry, wait a meeting (I think). You feel me? The Lord is constantly reminding us to slow down and do one thing at time. Multiple studies show multitasking not only decreases productivity, it also increases brain fatigue. And we don't need anymore of that.
Get Outside Daily
Whether it be for a walk, to tinker with my plants, or to just sit in the sunlight, I am making myself step outside daily. There is just something to be said for the outdoors and fresh air for our mental health.
Put Boundaries on Email & Social Media
I try to check my emails four times a day. First thing upon arrival to work, mid morning, after lunch and before leaving for the day. I also do no social media until lunch time with a focus more on Instagram than Facebook. Facebook is really hard for me right now. I also put my phone away (out of sight) after one last scroll/post in the evening. We have a charging station that all phones go into at night, so that temptation is removed.
Create a Weekly Meal Plan & Grocery Day
On Fridays, I plan our meals for the next week and put in a grocery order for me to pick up after work on Fridays. This takes one less thing off my plate every night wondering what I am cooking for dinner. It also helps us save money by keeping the grocery store trips to a minimum and focused.
Delegate Out What You Can
Listen there is so much to handle and manage. If there is anything you can delegate to another, please use this as your permission slip to do it. Your older kids can do their own laundry, everyone can pitch in to help clean up after dinner, you can order your groceries online and pick it up or have them delivered; there are so many options. Could you get together some kids outside of school with an older child to help them with their schoolwork? Could your husband do the grocery pickup or Costco runs? We have to let go of the mentality that we have to do everything. We don't and frankly we shouldn't. It enables our people to be entitled and lazy when we do everything. We are not doing anyone any favors by just doing it ourselves.
Listen mommas, this season is hard. Validate that first. Shushing yourself to be better and be stronger, really causes more stress. Next, rest in God’s sovereignty and His Peace. And finally, try one of these little tips to make the day a little lighter.
Love, B
Quick Guide to Building Routines
Mom, what should I do for my birthday party? Mom, what's for dinner? Honey, where is the ranch dressing? Where do you want to go for dinner? Mom, where are my football cleats?
So many decisions… ladies you feel me?
When I was a new ICU nurse, I was talking to a seasoned nurse one day about how tired I was from my previous day of work. I was lamenting on how I did not understand why I was so exhausted. The previous day was not physically challenging. And she wisely said it's not so much the physical that wears you down it is the mental energies spent that exhaust us.
And there you have it friends, the crux of daily life. The physical stress of caring for little people is real, don't get me wrong. I also believe the mental weariness brought on from decision fatigue is sneaky and exhausting.
There is a simple solution to help combat this overwhelming decision fatigue. Our people and their needs are not going anywhere. It is routine.
Routine helps fight decision fatigue.
Why are routines beneficial?
Routines create tasks that require no decision making. We need tasks that are automated. With automation, our brains don’t need as much energy to complete the tasks.
Routines create structure and rhythms. Listen, I think it is completely unreasonable to think that we have one set routine that all our people follow and we can never change that. Routines need to be flexible and work for you, not everyone else.
Routines create security and safety for our families. As much as we would love to frolic through life on adventures and sweet escapes, the truth is we all need structure to our days. In the book of Genesis in the Bible, it is pretty apparent that God believed in boundaries and structure to our days. In His creation of the world, day and night were created to signify the start and end of each day. God knew the predictability of our days and nights would help us feel safe and secure. And our children need that as well. Predictability and routine provide security for our children.
So how do we create a routine that works for us and our family?
Identify your pain points.
Do you always feel stressed in the evening due to after school activities, work and cooking? Do the mornings leave you frazzled by the time you get to work? If so, these are your pain points. If your mornings are working for you, then don't change a thing. The whole point is to do what works for you and your family, not everyone else. We have enough information telling us the “right” way to do things. No, listen momma, what is right for you and yours may be completely different than what works for me.
Decide what is important to you.
I need a little quiet to start my day before everyone needs me, so I set my alarm 30 minutes before my kids get up. But please know my kids are teenagers and I am not up with them all night. When my kids were little, I did not get up and have quiet time before they got up. I soaked up every last minute of sleep I could get. So decide what is important to you in this season. It's important to remember this too shall pass, so make sure you are honest with yourself about your season and limits.
Track how much time the important stuff takes.
I am constantly underestimating the amount of time something takes. Bless. You need to be honest about how much time it takes you to get ready, have breakfast or get the kids up. Its important to track the time it takes to do each thing. Stating you can do everything required every morning in one hour is probably unrealistic. But you could incorporate dry shampoo and pop tarts into your morning routine to save some time. It is truly up to you. (Yes, I give my kids pop tarts sometimes, I ate them daily for years - it will be okay)
Know your endpoint time and work back from it.
If your kiddo has to be dropped off at 8am at school and the drive there takes 15 minutes, then you know you have to leave your house by 745am. When you see your wake up time is 7am but you need 30 minutes to get yourself ready and one hour to get lil Suzy ready then its not computing. So once you know your endpoint time and your time it takes to complete your tasks you can work back from it. One of the benefits of this exercise is that it can help you eliminate some things off your routine. Maybe you have been mentally beating yourself up for not having Jesus and journaling time in the morning, but once you see all the time it takes to do all the things in the morning, plus get out the door on time, you realize that you would have to wake up at 4am to get it all in. So maybe some of these expectations are not realistic for you in this season. #cutthecrap momma!
Take time to ask God what He is asking of you in this season.
Ladies, we let Instagram and Pinterest tell us what we need to do this life that God has divinely given to us. He handpicked you to parent these kids, to work on that job, to love that man, not anyone else. So we need to make sure we filter the voices in our heads filled with shoulds and false expectations. Ask God for wisdom in your routines and he will give it to you.
How to Gain Peace in Your Life
Last week, I hoped on Facebook to scroll through as one does. As quickly as I had opened up my app, I was reading a thread with moms complaining about school. Everyone’s opinions were flying high and raging. Even though this had nothing to do with me, I noticed my heart was racing and my breathing was shallow. Now, I was anxious about my day, my week, well... everything.
It would be ignorant to dismiss the pulsating anxiety that is all around us and the effects its having on our lives. Opinions, anger and frustrations are being spewed in multiple platforms whether it be news, TV, commercials, social media or even conversations.
I knew that I needed to make some adjustments in my life to keep my peace. Basically, I needed to #cutthecrap. If you have been around here for a bit, I am pretty straight forward. I love to encourage women to slow down, simplify and find joy in their everyday lives. I also know that looks different for each person.
Many years ago, I had a breakdown. I was walking through loss of a family member, marriage strain, overwhelmed motherhood, financial hardships and job loss. During that time, I realized I had to #cutthecrap out of my life. I needed to define what was best for my family versus what opinions told me or expectations I had put on myself. I also needed to the #cutthecrap with God and my loved ones by being honest about how I was feeling and my needs.
Preserving our peace takes work. Below I am sharing ten ways to #cutthecrap and preserve your peace in this season.
1.Get Outside
You don't have to do a sweaty betty full workout everyday, but there is something calming about the outdoors to our souls. In the Psalm 19 verse 1, David declares The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. For me, being outside reminds of creation and God’s beauty. Plus, we all need Vitamin D to help our brains and hormones function properly. Sunlight is natural Vitamin D. Try to sit outside for at least 5 minutes or maybe take a walk. Anything simple will help.
2. Get quiet first thing in the morning before the rush of the day.
There is something so life giving about my coffee time in the morning before the rest of the house is awake. There is peace in the quiet. Read a bit, journal, or just sit in peace. The gift of quiet will soothe your weary mind.
3. Write out your feelings
Writing out how we are feeling can be so cathartic to our souls and minds. Usually when I brain dump or list my stresses, fears and worries, I find that I gain some clarity from God. Sometimes, it is a simple reminder that no human can possibly complete all the things I am expecting of myself. Other times, the brain dumping allows me to realize my thoughts are simply not true. I can then replace those negative thoughts with scripture and truth. This brings peace to my soul.
4. Watch your scroll
I have to put strict boundaries on myself with social media. I can get sucked in especially when I am tired. I think I am mindlessly scrolling, no big deal. But as I mentioned in the above story, it's affecting me. So now when I open my social media, I respond to my messages first (ie its social media meant for us to respond and interact). But I don't respond to negativity or anger (#cutthecrap). I don't need that. Then I look at a couple accounts I love and comment. But that’s it. No mindless scrolling, it drains me and steals my peace.
5. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad about yourself
Listen, I love a good workout inspiration, but I have to be careful that I am not comparing myself to the peeps on the internet. I have to be careful I am not looking at my dust bunny littered floors and comparing it to the perfection on the internet. So about every 2-3 months, I have to go through my follows and “mute” some accounts. Not because they are bad, it is just to preserve my mental health.
6. Get some sleep
Put the phone in another room and go to bed early. We must make sleep a priority. Maybe you can go without it better than me and live off of 5-6 hours of sleep, but not me. I need my sleep. What is a mountain of stress for me at night time will be a small issue after a night of rest. Listen, I know your phone is your alarm and what if the kids need me, etc BUT you will be a better mom to deal with life when you are rested. I use an Amazon Alexa as my alarm. It's $30 on amazon and we have one for each of the kids rooms. That way we can have music, timers, and alarms as needed in our rooms without our phones.
7. Limit your news intake.
I want to be informed too. And I wish I knew of a safe place for you & I to go and be informed without the negativity and agendas spewing in our faces. When I traveled in airports weekly for my job, I was always frustrated with the news on 24/7 loudly playing through the airports. As if air travel was not stressful enough, the addition of loud news piping through concourses made my anxiety rise. If it is your practice to get up, check the COV19 case numbers and tune into some news to start your day, peace is going to be harder to grasp.
8. Focus on things you can control.
Most of this life, we can not control. We like to think we can control outcomes. But there is good news, there are things we can control. Putting our energies into positive tasks can really help ease our anxious minds. I have placed my kindle app on the front page of my phone apps instead of social media, so I will read some on my phone instead of scrolling while I am waiting. I love to take a lavender, epsom salt bath at night to help relax to prepare my body for sleep. These are things I can control to help ease anxiety.
9. Talk to a trusted friend.
Some things I am worried about or frustrated with can be solved by good ol’ girl time. There are just things in motherhood that your man may never understand. Time to laugh, cry or share with a girlfriend can be just the medicine your soul needs. Here is a #cutthecrap tip, make sure you choose wisely. If you are only spending time with friends that gripe and complain about their husbands always, is that really decreasing your anxiety and improving your mental health? Or are they pointing their lives to truth and wisdom? Choose wisely friend.
10. Practice Prayer
I know it may seem cheesy to say prayer because isn't that what all Jesus loving people say? There is a peace that only He can provide. Phillipians 4; 6-7 says, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Taking time to present your worries and anxieties to God can help your mind feel at ease. For me, praying also helps me to be quiet, which can be hard to come by these days. Keeping a prayer journal is a great way to remember all God has done. Periodically, I go read my previous prayer requests and marvel at God’s faithfulness. Remembering God’s faithfulness will always increase your peace.
I hope you can at least pick one of these to help increase your peace today. Just remember, you can't pour out from an empty cup. Taking time to cultivate peace in your own heart is the best thing you can do for the others around you.
How to Change Your Mindset in an Overwhelmed Season
It all came rushing back, appointments, rehearsals, meetings and lots of change. I was overwhelmed. Honestly, I did not handle it well.
I snapped at those closest to me.
I yelled in a situation that needed a hug.
I chose mean, rude words instead of honest, clear words.
And by honest rude words, I dropped the F Bomb to my child. (I hope you feel better about yourself today)
But that's what busy overwhelmed lives do to us. We pile it all on, a yes here, a yes there, then more and more. We find ourselves rushing from one appointment to another, never really checking in with ourselves to see how we are feeling. Then our restless, weary souls spew on those closest to us.
I know right now you may be weary. We have been walking unknown territory for the last six plus months. Now, we find ourselves walking it all again with back to school and this fall season.
As I was processing all this with the Lord, I felt He needed us to know that we are in a season of transition. You may be saying yes that is where we have all been for the last 4000 days. While that is true, it is a transition again. But in this tranistion, God was asking me to change my perspective.
God was asking me to change my perspective in this new season.
What if this new season is an opportunity to grow closer to Him?
What if the overwhelm we feel is an opportunity for God to prioritize our lives?
What if the uncertainty of everything is to grow our faith?
What if we believed God was with us through it all, really with us, guiding us, leading us?
How would we approach this season differently?
Instead of defeat and weariness, maybe we were open and honest with ourselves and our families. Instead of fear at all times, maybe we would pray more. Instead of anxious thoughts all hours of the day, maybe we would be on the lookout for God to show up in our lives.
Embrace this new season with me. Embrace all its challenges, opportunities and fun. Embrace what God has for us this season. Let’s be open to what God wants to do through us this season.
Simplify Homeschool Toolkit
It's back to school time! Usually that time is met with excitement, apprehension and big changes. And this back to school season is met with all of those things, but let's add in a big ‘ol dose of global pandemic mania.
This means we have all had to consider homeschool to some extent as a new normal. Whether you are homeschooling 100%, virtual schooling, hybrid, distance learning or full time in a school building, this school season undoubtedly looks and feels different.
More responsibility is being placed on families to do...well it all. (Insert super anxious thoughts) This means if the adults in our homes work full time, then where and how do the kiddos do school and actually learn anything or sit still or behave or let’s see… survive!
As I personally have had 5000 questions about how this all going to go down in this back to school season, I have had to constantly remind myself who is in charge (News Flash- it's not me!). Honestly, I like to think I am, but I am not. I have recently spent some time asking God what He wants from me this season. At times like this, I can feel very unqualified and overwhelmed. God has continuously reminded me to surrender it all to Him and to take it one day at a time.
I wanted us to feel empowered and equipped this season with some new tools. That is why I created the Simplify Homeschool Toolkit. I know all these changes can feel overwhelming as we start a new season. This simplified toolkit gives 20 easy tips for schooling at home, plus bonus materials for socialization for age groups and encouragement for momma too.
I would love for you to have this toolkit as a free back to school gift and share it with a friend.
Please know we are walking this road together and I believe in you! If you need help decreasing the back to school anxiety, click here.
Love, B
5 Tips to Decrease School Anxiety
Here are 5 easy tips to decrease back to school anxiety for kiddos and parents.
Some things are completely out of our hands like global pandemics and school planning. These things may make you want to pull your hair out, or maybe it’s just me the control freak. We spend so much my time worrying about things that we have no control over which in turn causes anxiety. This also applies to our children as well, especially when these anxieties are topics of conversation in our daily lives. Let’s see if you have worried about any of the below questions in the last month? (please see me raising my hand) You are not alone!
How long will this pandemic last?
What about flu season coming up?
When will the kids be able to go back into the physical school building?
(These things we can not control)
So, as we approach the back to school season, let’s focus on things we can control so we can help decrease our anxiety. Free Tip: By working on our decreasing anxiety, we can help decrease our children’s. As the worry creeps in, let’s reroute it with truth. No, we may not know what this next season will look like with school buildings, but we can still create some schedule and routine for our days at home. We may not know how long this pandemic will last, but we can do our part by wearing a mask when we are out.
Put your focus where it matters, on things you can control.
Our words
Our actions
Our attitude
(These things we can control)
5 Tips to Decrease School Anxiety
Get prepared. We still needs school supplies working at home. Involve the kids in picking out new school supplies. New pencils, new markers, new notebooks will help interject some normalcy into the kiddos mindsets.
Create a morning routine. The predictability of the routine makes children feel safe. Set a wake up time for everyone, have breakfast together, and get dressed for the day. You might not be able to do all the things every morning, but start with one anchor to your day so there is some predictability.
Keep it Positive. Make your conversations about school (home, virtual, or at school) positive. Listen our kids don't need any more negative chatter about this whole situation. They are anxious enough. And frankly, we don't either. One hop on Facebook and you can get enough negativity for a lifetime. If you have concerns, talk to a trusted, truth seeking friend away from your kids. Ask teachers questions with a tone of “how can I help?”. Stop the negativity, its not helping anyone!
Ask your children how they are feeling. Sometimes we believe the less said, the better. Well, sometimes that is true. But we all need a safe place to discuss these changes. For our children, one of those places should be home with us.
Remember we can do hard things! We have been doing new, hard things since we brought these babies home. We must keep bringing it back to God knew we would be parents at this time. He knew what ages our kids would be. He knew what our jobs would look like during this season. He knew and He knows what will come of all this. So let’s trust that He will equip and empower us to walk through this season.
Love, B
How Are We Really Dealing with the Stress of this Season?
It was Friday eve, cue the music, confetti and cheering, I was heading into a week off of work. Its summa’ time baby and momma’s off of work for a whole week! Woohoo!
Fast forward to Monday morning, I am sitting with God feeling exhilarated, rested, joyful…
Umm Nope. I am irritated, mad and crabby.
Yes, that’s what I said, I was and still am a little angry with God. As I sat with my pen and paper, I started to brain dump a little.
Raining, bills, no vacation, kids at home, school survey, no back to school?, half back to school?, more online learning?, etc.
After some time of dumping my frustrations on paper, I realized I was frustrated with all of it. Yes, I was still frustrated with COV19. I thought we were done and moving on, but no it’s still continuing. Call me naive, but I was looking forward to moving past this season.
I mean come on God, are you serious?
Global pandemic - check
Racial injustice - check (this is not new, but I am learning so much more about the injustice in our world)
Sickness - check
Hate - check
Anger - check
Hostility - check
And not to mention, are my kids going back to school????????????????????? Ahhh!!!!!!!!!!!
But then I read this quote.
I think my vacation time allowed me to slow enough to actually stop fixing everything for everyone and managing all the things. I had been dealing with the stressors of life change in a global pandemic. Once I slowed down, I felt all the feelings of the last couple months and deal with the actual stress of it all. Truthfully, I wondered where God was (and is) in all of this and what the heck He was doing? My day continued on irritated and frustrated.
A couple days later, I had to take one of my children to the doctor for a yearly physical. There were shots involved and fear set in pretty strongly. On the way there, we were talking about fear and ways to practically deal with it. You know the basics - deep breaths, prayer, “you got this!”.
But then I found myself saying, “You know even in the hard stuff I have lived through in my life, I have always known that God was there and He never left me. I might not have understood it at the time, but I always knew He was there. And most of the time after it was over, I could look back and see there was some good that came from it and definitely some lessons I learned along the way.”
Well, dang- there God was showing up again as we headed down the highway. He was showing me what my heart needed to hear in this season-
He’s still here, He never left us and He is good.
So, even in my frustration and real grief of the hard season this has been and is, I know my Father has us all in His Hands.
Love, B
10 Truths to Change Your Mindset to Enjoy Life
As moms words like “tired, overwhelmed and frustrated” seem to be the general language of our life. And we are definitely those things a lot, but are we helping or harming the situation by professing those words constantly.
What if we were to declare truths more than our frustrations, so our mindset would change. Then maybe the tone of our life and home would change. In fact, I know it would.
In Ephesians, Paul says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. We all know we are supposed to speak kindness to others , but are we speaking words to build ourselves up? In Matthew 15, Jesus says “it's not what goes into your mouth that defiles you; you are defiled by the words that come out of your mouth.”
That is why I created these 10 truths to profess to ourselves and our homes. I need to rewire my brain in this season. Our words are important. They have power. So let’s start declaring these truths over our life. It just might change our lives!
10 Truths to Change Your Mindset to Enjoy Life
I am chosen by God, holy & dearly loved. (Col 3.12)
I know that all things are working together for good. (Rom 8:28)
I have the mind of Christ (1 Cor 2:16)
I will experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then I will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. (Eph 3:19)
I will practice good planning and hard work leading to prosperity, but I will stop hasty shortcuts that lead to poverty. (Prov 21:5)
I will trust in the Lord with all my heart; I will not lean on my own understanding. I will seek his will in all I do & He will show me which path to take. (Prov 3:5-6)
I will not copy the behaviors and customs of the world, but I will let God transform me into a new person by changing the way I think. Then I will learn God’s will for me which is good & perfect.(Romans 12:2)
I will commit my actions to the Lord, and know my plans will succeed. (Prov 16:3)
I will fix my thoughts on what is authentic and real, honorable and admirable, beautiful and respectful, pure and holy, merciful and kind. I will fix my thoughts on God’s glorious work with praise. (Phil 4:8 TPT)
I will ask God for wisdom, as he is generous to me and will give it to me. (James 1:5)
I am working on this one with you! Love, B
21 Free Family Fun Activities
Do you ever feel like you are the only family without a wonderful, exotic summer vacation planned?
Or do you ever feel like you want to simplify your life but you feel pulled in a thousand different directions due to “keeping up with the Jones”?
Or do you ever feel like a “no fun mom” because there is not a lot of fun planned in your day to day?
Yep. I think we all feel that way sometimes, but let me add a little relief to this situation.
Relief Granted: You can have a fun summer at home with simple activities.
It’s true. Think about it when you look back to your childhood, I bet some of your best memories of summer are pretty simple things. Backyard sprinkler fun, cold kool-aid and ham sandwiches, and trips to the library are some of my favorite memories. We tend to place these false expectations on ourselves of what we think summer “should” look like for our families. The world screams go here, do this, have fun, make it special, get creative, and more and more. All the while we are exhausted just thinking about everything, much less implementing all the “shoulds”.
That's why I created this free, printable list of 21 simple, fun family activities we can do at home. You can print this list out or save it on your phone. Then when you are wondering, "What the heck am I going to do with these kiddos?"; you can pick something from this list to add some smiles to your day!
Click here to get your free Family Fun Activities List .
Love, B
When You are Overwhelmed with Uncertainty and Injustice
Am I being too silent?
Am I saying enough?
Am I sharing enough with my kids?
Am I protecting my kids enough?
Am I raising them right?
Am I screwing them up?
Are the pandemic numbers rising?
Are cases increasing now because there is more testing?
Am I contributing to the pandemic?
Am I being too callous? Too strict?
I know it can be so overwhelming. I know I feel it too.
Lately, I have been sitting with the Lord asking for clarity and peace. Clarity and peace in my home, my community and our world. Each day He sustains me. He gives me little nuggets of hope, His Sovereignty and His Love. The beauty of this season is it’s a chance for us to pull closer to our Savior. We can’t let the world tell us what we need to do. One minute we need to go out and then the next minute we need to stay in. One minute we need to speak up and the next minute we need to be peaceful. It’s exhausting!
So this morning as I was reading and pleading with God for answers, He led me to this verse.
This verse gives me hope. I hope it gives you the same. Even with God’s help, we will not get it right 100% of the time. But I can flood my home, my soul and my community with kindness. We can model justice and act accordingly. Finally, may we humble ourselves with God.
Five Tips when you feel Overwhelmed in This Season of Injustice and Uncertainty
Find some space for your soul to recenter. Nothing helps me like a good walk with worship music playing. Take a bath or a drive, just get alone for some space.
Put strict boundaries around your social media feeds and news. Information is good and vital right now. Social media is meant to be social, not a download of everyone else’s opinions and frustrations into our brains 24 hours a day. Check in but then go live your life. Watch your scroll.
Have conversations about injustice and uncertainty around the dinner table. I believe in the power of the table. We tend to want to click and comment about all the injustice and uncertainty, but what we need is more conversation. The dinner table is a great place to start.
Find a scripture that soothes your mind and heart, like the one above. God’s word is alive. It is a tool that can help us. We just have to use it. Write it down, memorize it and share it. Don’t discount the power of God’s word.
Pray. Cover your home, your heart, your community and our world.
Lord, You are Holy, Sovereign and Powerful. We come to you with open arms and bowed heads in surrender. We admittedly do not have all the answers. We feel overwhelmed with our circumstances. Fear is running rampant through our world. We declare this is not from you. We know you are a God of hope and justice. You are full of grace and truth. God fill us with your Holy Spirit. May we be instruments for You. Give us Your Peace that surpasses all understanding. In Jesus Name, Amen
Love, B
5 Simple Tips for Summer Chores
I am constantly looking for ways to simplify and work smarter, not harder. Summertime is a welcome, cherished time in our home, but it's admittedly a weird time now. We, like you & your family, have been living in a global pandemic. We have been under "stay at home" orders for two months. While here in SC, some of the restrictions are lifting, we can safely say this is not a normal summer.
That's why I wanted to share with you some tips we use here in our home to help summer time be pleasurable for everyone. Now, more than ever we have a chance to teach our children some life skills that will serve them in the present and the future, as well as help our homes run a little smoother. I mean who doesn't want that!
I have developed a simple, customizable chore chart that takes the guess work out of what your children's daily agenda will be. This chart allows them something to reference to know what's expected each day. It can also be a way to encourage responsibility and earn rewards.
Here are some quick tips to customizing your chore chart.
Identify your homes "pain points" or problem areas. For example, one hallway in our home always stays dirtier since everyone tracks in and out of that side of the house. So, one chore for our home is to vacuum that hallway. That is off my list to worry about and I know it's getting cleaned. Win-Win!
Keep the chores quick and easy. Take it from a momma that can accidentally over complicate, just keep it simple. We increase our chances of the work getting completed well when the chore is quick and simple.
Keep the chores age appropriate. Truthfully, those kiddos can do more than we give them credit for. Young elementary school age children can empty the dishwasher with help. Preschoolers can wipe down a table or counter top. Click here for my Pinterest board for more age appropriate ideas.
Show them first what your expectations are for each chore, then make sure they demonstrate it back to you. They might not know that you want the toothpaste wiped out of the bottom of the sink until you show them.
Praise and Grace. Praise when the job is well done, give grace when its mediocre. Rewards may be fun outings, allowance or treats. Whatever works for your family!
Click here to get your free, customizable chore chart.
Love, B