5 Things Saving My Life Right Now
Recently, it has become quite a heavy load for the parents (especially moms) of the world. We have added so many new responsibilities in the last 6 months. Frankly, in the last month things have really cranked up. (Side note: my family makes fun of me for using the term “cranked up” because I am usually referring to a car. I am from the South, bless my heart)
Now in this eternal quarantine, we have the back to school part portion added in. This portion of the quarantine has thrown us for a loop. For most of the world, we are homeschooling to some extent. And with that comes so many challenges and new responsibilities. From your child’s IT manager to cafeteria employee to recess enforcer, oh and by the way, make sure you maintain that job and home you are grateful to have. Also, after school activities have started back. In one sense, we went from everyone at home to now everyone going in many different directions.
The other day I was venting in my journal. “God, it's the school work, my job, this house, the bills, the groceries, the crazy unrest in our world, injustices, inequalities, anger, government, sickness, unknowns, uncertainties,...hard, hard things. I felt the Lord tug on my heart. I think you might need to hear this too. He said to me,
“Are you holding yourself to a higher standard than I have asked of you?
I am perfection, not you”.
I went on to write this download from the Lord in my journal.
“Please validate the way you are feeling. Stop trying to push it away, cover it with pep talks and task lists. This season is hard. You do have more responsibilities than ever before. Validate that you are weary. Validate that this season is weird and new. And validate that you feel like a fish out of water at times.
I am the Way and the Truth. But, I am not a harsh taskmaster slapping a demerit on some scorecard every time you mess up or lose it. I created you and knit you together in your mother’s womb. I know your weaknesses and your gifts, in fact I placed them there. Each delicate piece, I put together uniquely. I have never asked you for perfection, this is from the world.
I am grace, love, mercy, tenderness, kindness, forgiveness, peace and hope. I am the Sovereign God, but I am also deeply personal to you.”
God quickly reminded me that I was holding myself to a standard that He never asked me too. And frankly, I was holding everyone around me to that same standard. It was a gentle, but powerful reminder.
So as I let that truth wash over me, I also needed to implement some practical solutions to my everyday life.
5 Things Saving My Life Right Now
Do One Thing at a Time
Honestly, this is my worst enemy. Working from home for years has made me some type of multitasking, over ambitious crazy person. The day goes something like this -work at your desk, go to the bathroom, scrub the toilet, start a load of laundry, answer an email, hop on a zoom call, help write an English paper for one child, rehearse geometry with another child and oh yeah the laundry, wait a meeting (I think). You feel me? The Lord is constantly reminding us to slow down and do one thing at time. Multiple studies show multitasking not only decreases productivity, it also increases brain fatigue. And we don't need anymore of that.
Get Outside Daily
Whether it be for a walk, to tinker with my plants, or to just sit in the sunlight, I am making myself step outside daily. There is just something to be said for the outdoors and fresh air for our mental health.
Put Boundaries on Email & Social Media
I try to check my emails four times a day. First thing upon arrival to work, mid morning, after lunch and before leaving for the day. I also do no social media until lunch time with a focus more on Instagram than Facebook. Facebook is really hard for me right now. I also put my phone away (out of sight) after one last scroll/post in the evening. We have a charging station that all phones go into at night, so that temptation is removed.
Create a Weekly Meal Plan & Grocery Day
On Fridays, I plan our meals for the next week and put in a grocery order for me to pick up after work on Fridays. This takes one less thing off my plate every night wondering what I am cooking for dinner. It also helps us save money by keeping the grocery store trips to a minimum and focused.
Delegate Out What You Can
Listen there is so much to handle and manage. If there is anything you can delegate to another, please use this as your permission slip to do it. Your older kids can do their own laundry, everyone can pitch in to help clean up after dinner, you can order your groceries online and pick it up or have them delivered; there are so many options. Could you get together some kids outside of school with an older child to help them with their schoolwork? Could your husband do the grocery pickup or Costco runs? We have to let go of the mentality that we have to do everything. We don't and frankly we shouldn't. It enables our people to be entitled and lazy when we do everything. We are not doing anyone any favors by just doing it ourselves.
Listen mommas, this season is hard. Validate that first. Shushing yourself to be better and be stronger, really causes more stress. Next, rest in God’s sovereignty and His Peace. And finally, try one of these little tips to make the day a little lighter.
Love, B
